Finale.

Saud: "Well maybe I don't want to "handle it" anymore." Then he stormed out and slammed the door.

My god, this week just keeps getting worse and worse. 

---------

I decided that I couldn't take staying in my room any longer.

Everyone was still in class so I went to the entertainment room.

When I reached it, I broke down and started crying again.

After a solid 20 minutes of crying Faisal walked by the room, then came back and came inside.

"I'm going to kick his ass."

I cried even harder.

He took of his jacket and covered me.

Faisal: "Lama, it's me."

I broke down, and he put his arm around me and I laid my head on his chest, and I automatically felt better.

"I thought you hated me, I thought I lost you." I weeped.

Faisal: "Lama I love you, I can never hate you, and you will NEVER lose me."

I hugged him tighter. "I'm sorry Fasooli."

Faisal: "Don't be it's my fault. I should've told you how I felt."

I cried harder. "I know it's only been two days but I missed you! I missed talking to you."

He held my face between his hands: "Hey! You can always talk to me! Nothing can ever change that Lama."

I cried: "Walah i love you Fasooli."

Faisal: "It's okay I know. Where is he? Ana a3lmk fii."

Me: "I was crying about you."

He smiled, and tightened his hug.

Me: "Why aren't you in class?"

Faisal: "Mn meta o ana a7'6r morning classes?"

I smiled.

He then added: "Plus I have to pack."

I cried again: "You're leaving because of me I know it."

Faisal: "Because of you, and because of other things."

Me: "Other things meaning me."

He smiled: "No, Yalla I have to finish packing."

I smiled.

He left and I stayed there staring at the wall.

-------

Later that day Jenna was showing me what she was wearing to the formal. It was a beautiful navy dress.

Me: "Bandar bynjn!"

She blushed and giggled.

Reem: "A9ln going alone is so much better than going with a guy. ew. I'm glad I'm on the decorating committee awnslii. "

We all laughed.

Saud calling...

I hung up, but he kept calling and I kept hanging up.

When his calls passed the 10 mark I answered.

Me: "What?"

Saud: "Lama esm3eeni o la tgooleen shai."

Me: "Baa-"

Saud: "La tgooleen shai."

Saud: "Only an asshole would kick someone when they're down, and I'm sorry. Walla asf 7beebti ma tstahleen aswi feek kitha bss walla lisa mo gadr athmn klami. You know how jealous I get! I'm really sorry, and I was wondering if you would still let me be your date to the formal?"

Even though I got sick and tired of the jealous mawal, his tone was really sincere and I felt really good after my talk with Faisal.

Me: "Okay."

Saud: "Okay? If I knew it was that easy kan ma 3dt this apology milion mara b mo5ii."

I smiled. Cutie!

-------

I looked at myself in the mirror. No one would look at me and know that I was crying my eyes out these past few days.

I parted my hair to the right and waved it in a retro style. I wore a long red strapless dress and it had a slit on the side, and a red lip to match. I sprayed a couple of sprays of my favorite perfume, and heard a knock on the door.

I opened the door and Saud didn't say a word, he just looked at me.

Saud: "You look..."

Me: "What? Is something wrong with my hair? I know I should've parted it in the middle."

Saud: "You look breathtakingly beautiful."

I blushed.

He kissed my cheek and hugged me and picked me up.

Saud: "Lazm takleen shai bt5tfeen."

I smiled and hit his hand:"Yalla we better hurry up we're late."

-

We got to the gym, and it looked beautiful!

Reem and the committee really outdid themselves!

Bandar, Jenna, Turki, Malak (X), Reem, and Aziz were sitting on one of the tables on the right.

We got us some cokes and joined them.

Me: "Reem everything looks AMAZING!"

She smiled: "I know."

I don't blame her she should be proud.

A couple of songs later, a song came on and Saud stood up.

He put his hand out for me: "A dance my lady."

Me: "Of course my good sir."

We headed out to the dance floor and danced to the melody.

Saud: "It's just a good thing to know."

Me: "What is?"

Saud: "That I'm here with the most beautiful girl in the room."

I smiled.

Me: "Tbaal'3 Saud:"

Saud: "La Lama ma abal'3." Then he pulled away and held my hands and looked me in the eyes.

Saud: "Lama I love you."

There they were. The three words I've been yearning to hear all along.

But...I didn't feel happiness when he said it. I felt... sad! I couldn't say it back.

Actually it didn't feel right saying it back, because I knew deep down in my heart that wasn't how I felt about him.

At that moment, in the midst of all the music and people and his eyes, I realize that what I felt for Saud wasn't love. Reem's right!

I have limited my sight and I wasn't appreciating what was right in front of me.

Saud gives me butterflies and makes me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world, but I realized that was crushing over a guy and really liking him, not loving him! 

The only person I wanted to tell that I love was... Faisal!

I realized that I was just looking at Saud without saying anything.

Me: "I'm sorry Saud."

He had a confused look on his face.

Saud: "You're sorry? For what?"

Me: "Saud I thought I felt the same way, but I don't." Before he could say anything I added: "You're an amazing guy and I'm sure that the right girl would be lucky to have you and would love you unconditionally.  I thought I wanted to hear those words from you, I thought I felt the same way, but I don't. I hate that I didn't realize this sooner because it's unfair to you and unfair to me and to him. I'm sorry Saud."

After what I said I walked away because I couldn't bear the thought of him yelling at me, even though I deserved it.

Saud really is an amazing person, but when you know you know! 

I called Faisal but his phone was turned off.

I ran to the table: "TURKI! Did Faisal leave yet?????"

Turki: "Yea."

A tear shed from my eye and made its way down my cheek.

He then said: "Twa 6al3 el7gi 3leeh."

I quickly ran, and I heard Turki scream: "HE'S IN THE BUS STATION NOT THE AIRPORT."

I got in a taxi and told him to go to the bus station.

I don't care if I'm going to look like a cheesy girl from a cheesy movie showing up at the bus station to tell the man I love that I love him, because I do!

I love Faisal.

 "I'll be back leave the meter running." I said to the taxi driver whilst jumping out of the cab.

I ran inside to look for him, and through the sea of people I saw the back of his head at the end of the station.

I ran as fast as I could in my heels, my dress was flying all over the place, and I looked stupid, but I didn't care.

All I cared about was telling him how I feel.

I poked his shoulder from the back.

He took his headphone out, and looked at me.

Lama: "You really didn't think you were getting away that easy?"

Faisal: "Lama esh jabk hena?"

Lama: "This is going to sound like the cheesiest thing ever, but Faisal maybe I needed my eyes to be opened for me, and tonight they were. Faisal I love you, and not the brother-sister love, no Faisal I love you. I love you with all of my heart, and I'm sorry it took me this long to realize it... You have always been there for me. I know that the long distance doesn't work but if you'll still have me we'll make it work. I know I don't deserve you, not after what I've done, and I hope you can find it in your heart to still love me. I know that I threw this big thing at you, and you need time. I'm going to leave now and call me when you know what you want to do."

I turned around and started walking when I felt a hand on my shoulder. He turned me around.

Faisal: "Now you really didn't think you were getting away THAT easy?"

He held me closer and hugged me.

I couldn't help, the tears started pouring. He pulled away from me and wiped them away.

Faisal: "Who said anything about long distance? Engblt b jam3t elpetrol."

I was ecstatic, but I couldn't even form words to say mabrook. I kept crying because this is too good to be true!

Faisal: "I love you Lama."

I cried and laughed at the same time. The words sounded different from Faisal's mouth.

They sounded... Right!

Lama: "I love YOU."

So... this is love?
Love isn't one answer, love is everything.
Love is a punch in the face and a kick to the stomach.
Love is pain.
Love is showing your weak spot to that special person because you know in your heart that they will never hurt you.
Love is knocking down the walls you put around your heart, because the person you love made you forget why you put them there in the first place.
Love is loving someone's flaws because it's what makes them special in your eyes.
Love is hopeless.
Love is care.

Love is blind.
Love is... beautiful.

----

I would like to thank my beautiful best friend for letting me share her wonderful and amazing story. 

I would also like to thank my readers who always kept me motivated and shares their thoughts with me. You really kept me going! I love you <3

If there are any questions feel free to ask! 

Ask.fm/So_Thisislove

Best wishes my loves!